Friday, 12 September 2008

How to avoid a having a caesarean

I have been working on a post on my serious blog about avoiding caesareans and in trying to be rational, wise and balanced I couldn't say what I wanted to say - but I can here!!

How to avoid a caesarean
  1. Don't get pregnant
  2. If you do, don't go near a hospital
  3. Don't go near an obstetrician (OBY/GN in US)
  4. Definitely don't go anywhere near a trainee obs. or house doctor
  5. If you must see an obstetrician in labour, see a consultant
  6. Give birth during day time hours when a consultant is more likely to be in the building
  7. Ask your midwife which consultant to see
  8. Remember you are quite entitled to walk out of their consulting room or even their hospital
  9. Love your midwife
  10. Don't let her leave
  11. Don't go near a bed
  12. Or an electronic fetal monitor
  13. Or an epidural
  14. Or pethidine
  15. Or anyone who is afraid
  16. Or doesn't believe you can do it
  17. Find a midwife who has seen a home birth
  18. Spend your last few months doing hand stands to make sure the baby is not breech
  19. If it is breech don't tell anyone, find an experienced midwife and wait to see what happens in labour
  20. Refuse internal examinations
  21. Find water
  22. Get in a bath, a shower, or if you're lucky (or at home) a birth pool
  23. Walk
  24. Dance
  25. Kiss
  26. Laugh
  27. Breathe
  28. Stay away from the US
  29. and Mexico
  30. Move to the Netherlands
  31. Don't go to a private hospital
  32. Do go to a private midwife
  33. Be a man

1 comment:

Lian Horvat said...

LOL this was so funny! I had so many things going against me having a vbac, but I went on to have my super awesome HBAC! :)